"I could complain, but what's the point?"
Heard those words the other night, and smiled.

What follows is directed at no one in particular, as I've had numerous influences. I tend to rant about lack of drug legality or shit going on with the environment and such, so have something different. It's very 'I' heavy, but I don't care.

Lately I've been feeling like some think of me as a rope in a game of tug of war, only the game being played is hardly being played for fun. Pull too hard and I will wish rope burn on your hands, I am also far from impervious to schadenfreude. There are games I enjoy and these will be joined voluntarily upon my wishing. Pulling on me to off-balance another, c'mon. I do not mind when people vent, it's absolutely necessary to blow off steam at times, but it is another thing entirely when you play the victim and slander others, in attempts to elicit a response from me (or others) to join your side. It's all so much bullshit to play the victim yet continue getting into (even forcing) these situations wherein repetition of perceived victimization is sure to follow.

They: "Guess what so and so did to me."
My thoughts: "What the fuck could you have expected? Seriously."

I mean, the world and situations are so much more complex than A acted on B, as if B were some inanimate object waiting to be worked on. Instead there's a whole confluence of forces, though it is pretty easy to focus on just one. This whole subject/object mover/moved victimizer/victim dichotomy in thought does not do one's mental capabilities justice, and crying wolf after egging another on when you damned well know what their response will be is fucking lame, hey, but do whatever furthers your ability to bitch and moan while feeling wronged and right. In feeling wronged the other becomes wrong and you right, them active victimizer you passive victim. Oh, such compelling stories. Two illusory sides. Divine Heaven separate from base Earth. Republican from Democrat. Right from Left. Truth from lies. There are distinctions, yes, but absolute separation (and absolute contradiction)? We're all big kids here, we can do whatever the fuck we please, even continue wearing blinders that ignore the connections.

I am not saying that there are no victims: sometimes it occurs that a psychopath breaks into your house and stabs you to death, but so so so many other times these psychos are antagonized and what they do is far from murder.

I am not your intermediary, I will not judge with you, I will not judge you, I do not hate, but would love to fill my ears a million times over with needles and cover them with cement, than hear some unconvincing talk of how sweet little innocent you have been done a great injustice unexpectedly (unless such is honestly the case). It's not that I don't care, I just care much much less when someone's trying to sell me a story involving these dichotomies and insist on them absolutely.

Some have acted as if I'm naive and unaware of shit (which has some basis some times), hence my inaction regarding some situations. I think another part of this is an assumed belief that, if I knew the same shit, I'd act in the same way. Not so. We all have different tolerances (wow, really?). As time passes I find my values increasingly at odds with those of another or others, for example, I don't think murder is wrong and have no problem with pedophilia. Oh my! What poor judgement on my behalf! Nah, lack of judgement, rather.

-Chad, your less-than-sympathetic neighborhood curmudgeon.